>> Monday, May 13, 2013
Ideas to simplify your habits,
attitudes and environment in order to lead
an extraordinary, successful, mindful life.
For those of you who haven't followed, let me begin by telling you that I lost my husband, 46, to cancer last year after a mercifully short battle with Glioblastoma Multiforme.
It was singly the most brutal time in my life watching the beautiful man I married get eaten alive by this angry, festering disease. We did our best to bring a quality of life to the few functioning days we had but as you may know there is no happy ending with this type of cancer.
We were blindsided by the lightning speed at which our lives were torn apart and now I am left to redefine, reinvent, and reassess.
How do you return to normal when you now have ringside insight into the delicate window and fleeting nature of it all. How do you wake up every day and face a world that no longer includes your list of hopes and dreams for someday?
e.e. cummings penned one of my favorite pieces reminding us of all the "coulda, shoulda, woulda's that have gone before us and the road not taken. The six crumbs reflect all the things Effie did not do throughout her life (with regrets?).
Who among us can claim never to have made a mistake, missed a goal, regretted a choice...?
Life life with no regrets, not wishing you had done something differently....this is not a dress rehearsal. In the rear view mirror don't look back and wish you had let yourself be happier.
embrace every opportunity you happen upon. be softer with everyone including yourself. put it all out there. now~
here is little Effie’s head
whose brains are made of gingerbread
when the judgment day comes
God will find six crumbs
stooping by the coffinlid
waiting for something to rise
as the other something did -
you imagine His surprise
bellowing through the general noise
Where is Effie who was dead?
- to God in a tiny voice,
I am may the first crumb said
whereupon its fellow five
crumbs chuckled as if they were alive
and number two took up the song,
might i’m called and did no wrong
cried the third crumb, I am should
and this is my little sister could
with our big brother who is would
don’t punish us for we were good;
and the last crumb, with some shame
whispered unto God, my name
is must and with the others i’ve
been Effie who isn’t alive
just imagine it I say
God amid a monstrous din
watch your step and follow me
stooping by Effie’s little, in
(want a match or can you see?)
which the six subjunctive crumbs
twitch like mutilated thumbs:
picture His peering biggest whey
coloured face on which a frown
puzzles, but I know the way -
(nervously Whose eyes approve
the blessed while His ears are
with the strenuous music of
the innumerable capering damned)
- staring wildly up and down
the here we are now judgment day
cross the threshold have no dread
lift the sheet back in this way.
here is little Effie’s head
whose brains are made of gingerbread.
I love Leo Babuata of Zen Habits. As one on my favorite bloggers, I have followed him around like a puppy waiting for an enlightening morsel to fall to the floor. Leo never fails to elicit a deep sigh and reflection from his thoughtful posts.
...And I am struck by the beauty of this world, and the fragile human lives struggling to make their way within it.And shaken.The pain and stress and anger and sadness and loneliness and frustration and fear and cravings and irritations that we will experience today … they are made up. We can let them go as easily as they arise. They are unnecessary, if we realize that we’ve created them for no good reason.Instead, see the beauty in every moment. In every person’s so human actions. In our own frailties and failures...
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